Celebration of Helen's Life

Many family and friends have asked that my father make available the homily and eulogies to our mother. I have written out the entire funeral service that took place at St. Anne's Church, Palmyra, New York 9:00 AM Saturday 24 February, 2007.

WELCOMING RITE

The pallbearers were the oldest son from each of Helen and Joe's family of six children

Eric Kazimir son of Catherine (Mack) Wilson
Daniel Mack Jr. son of Daniel Mack Sr.
Joseph Mack son of Thomas Mack
Chad Perkins son of Barbara (Mack) Perkins
Nathan Mack nephew of Mary (Mack) Darcangelo, son of Daniel Mack Sr.
Robert Cooper son of Sharon (Mack) Cooper

Entrance Song: City of God

Eulogy: Barbara (Mack) Perkins

I can't think of a better way to explain a eulogy than to give tribute to a great woman: my mother.

My mother passed away on February 21 at 1:20 a.m. And my life will never again be the same. She was my best friend. We would gab for hours about life, spirituality, world events, family, the weather, crafts and on and on it would go. There was no such thing as quick phone call to Mom.

Mom was born in Union, NY, she had 1 older brother and 2 younger sisters. She graduated from Union Endicott High School class of 1942. She played the clarinet in the marching band and had a wonderful appreciation of music. My mother took the nurse’s training course at St. Mary’s Hospital in Rochester and graduated in 1945 with her RN. She met my dad when she was working as an industrial nurse at IBM in Endicott. He received medical attention from a pretty young nurse when he came to the first aid a few times. Mom would remember, “Every time he came in, my heart would skip a beat, but I didn’t say anything to him. He would sit quietly while I attended to him.” The love between them grew and led to 60 years of marriage, six children, 15 grandchildren and 12 great grandchildren. How awesome is that! What is even more amazing is that both mom and dad grew closer together over the years and their love for each other grew and endured some hard times as well as good times.

My mom was dying, she experienced her death, she died and now she is dead. Please don’t refrain from saying the “D” word with her family. Please don’t refrain from using her name in your common household chatter. Mom, Dad and I had many conversations about death. What a gift that I knew exactly what Mom wanted her funeral mass to be like, the music, the outfit she wanted to be buried in. If Mom was here she would tell us it’s such a shame that everyone typically wears black at funerals. Everyone should dress in bright party clothes. Mom viewed death as a celebration of life just as we would celebrate a birth. Do not be sad for Mom – celebrate for her.

She is exactly where she needs to be today. We are all exactly where we need to be. She is very proud of all of us – family and friends. The outpouring of love and caring would have made her smile that wonderful smile of hers.There are so many stories to tell. Funny stories, sad stories, happy stories, and some pretty amazing stories.Mom was a great teacher. She taught many things to many people. She only taught me two, everything I say and everything I do. (lol).

One of my favorites stories is about her birthday. Mom was born on the 4th of July, 1924. Every year on her birthday there would be celebrations across the nation. No one went to work; there were parades, picnics and fireworks. As a very young child she thought, “Isn’t this great, all these people are celebrating my birthday!” When she was a little older she finally realized that it was also our nation’s birthday. Her birthdays were a special time for our family. We would always sing Yankee Doodle Dandy after the birthday song. One year when I was a young woman, living on my own, I wasn’t able to afford the gas to drive from Albany to Binghamton. My dad really wanted all of us home and I was the only one not able to make it. He asked me if I had a penny jar, which of course I did, so I rolled up all $5.45 worth, gased up my 1964 Chevy Impala V8 and drove home for broke. I did make it home with the engine running on the smell of gas for the last mile. Mom was so happy that I made it home.

My mom’s faith in God is what I most admired. When I failed, she would remind me that it wasn’t the end of the world. And when I acted like a jerk, she wasn’t afraid to call me on it, love me through it, and forgive me for it. She often loved me in spite of myself. When I couldn’t hear the Lord speak to me, I could always reach out to my mom and she would take me by the hand and walk me through the crisis. Her faith in God never wavered even when she experienced trauma, sickness and the deaths of loved ones. But I wasn’t the only person she did this with. My mother had very strong faith and her spirituality was backed up with an amazing knowledge of the bible. She taught what she knew to anyone who wanted to learn. Mom used to tell me, “God, he know what he do.” She got that from an elderly black women she visited in a nursing home in Charlotte, NC.

She was a great role model to so many people. Not only did my mom change the lives of so many people, but she left behind a legacy that will not be forgotten. A legacy that says:value people enough to make a difference in their lives;laugh often, especially at yourself;love people as you love yourself;have faith that the Lord will lead you, and always remember to be true to yourself.

Today, we say goodbye to a great woman, wife, sister, mother, grandmother and friend. May she rest in peace and know that she will always be loved, remembered and cherished. We love you Mom!

Barbara also read an email that Cathie (Mack) Wilson sent from Thailand

You and I have been so close over the years and know each others hearts so well that I probably would have written something very similiar. The bits about mom and how she was there for us were true for me as well, especially when I could not hear God she would walk with me and guide me until I could.

Oh, dear God in heaven how I will miss those long conversations and how I wish I could hear one more time about her accident even though I want to bean her every time she starts.

When I come to visit I want to be with you and it is just killing me inside that I can't be there for her funeral. However, there is so much comfort to know the words you will say are the words I would say and that I find so much comfort that all my children and grandchildren are there even though I am missing. I love me kids so dearly. And mom taught me the same lessons that she taught you. Dick commented on that after he read your words. That both you and I learned to live the teachings of our mother. How wonderful is that!?

I miss you sooooooo much and the tears just keep coming but not from saddness so much as selfishness that I will no longer have anyone that can talk to me for hours about everything and then rehash it over again with some new insight. I am going to miss that most.

LITURGY OF THE WORD

First Reading: Isaiah 25: 6a, 7-8b

Responsorial Psalm: Psalm #27 and # 39

Second Reading: 2 Cor. 5: 1-10

Gospel: John 14: 1-6

Holmily: Fr. Jim read the homily that Deacon Joseph Mack wrote for his wife:

Jesus tells us: "Do not let your hearts be troubled. Have faith in God and Faith in me."

We are all on a journey and in the process of moving twoards death. And though we should die, we will come to life again in the Resurecction.

Resurrection is going on in our lives at this very moment. Because ours is a Resurrection Faith, we know there is a new world coming in Brotherhood.

Every Sunday, during Mass, we profess our Faith in the Resurrection. It may well be that when we recite the words of the Creed and say, "We look for the Ressurection of the Dead," we give the words little more than passing attention. Then comes the day when they take on a personal meaning for us, because we are laying to rest someone we love. We look for the Ressurection of the dead now because life without that expectation would lack meaning and completeness. At moments like these, we are forced to draw seriously on our faith and to explore its meaning with our hearts as well as our minds.

Jesus tells us in the Gospel that he is going to prepare a place for us. Jesus died on the cross for us and on the third day he was raised from the dead. The Christian Church, from the very first mement of existence, has believed and preached that what happened to Jesus would happen to us, for he was the first fruit of the whole harvest of which we are a part.

We shall be raised to a new life, because he took upon himself the experience of pain and death. That is why, although we mourn the departure of those we love, we do so in the knowldege that we are also celebrating their homecoming to be with the Lord.

In a special way Helen has touched our lives with experiences to be shared and remembered. She has been a wife, mother, sister, daughter, grandmother, and a friend to those who knew her and much more. All Gospel readings leave us with a story and these stories are told over and over again. And so each one of us will also leave behind something to be remembered by others.

In a very special way Helen touched many lives with her experiences. She loved reading the Bible and took speical lessons in Greek so she could translate the Gospel message handed down in Greek. She was a natural teacher to both adults and children. She had a special way of making scripture seem interesting and challenging. Many times she would have a story to go with the scripture and people would always remember the story.

Helen was a Mayflower Descendant. When she taught the 5th grade religious education class she would alwasy tell them, "I'm part English and I can be a lady. I'm part Irish and I have a temper. And I am part American Indian and if you don't behave I can go on the warpath."

Helen enjoyed many other hobbies. Such as gardening, playing the piano, working logic and sudoku puzzles. She made many of her daughters clothing, quickly learned the art of tailoring and knitted many afgans and blankets. She helped her daughters by instructing them in different activities.

She had a beautiful smile that could win people over. There is no doubt that Helen's friendship, wisdom and sense of humor will be forever implanted in those who knew her. She especially loved her family and really enjoyed caring for and praying for them.

Her message this morning to her family:

LOVE ONE ANOTHER, AS I HAVE LOVED YOU

CARE FOR ONE ANOTHER, AS I HAVE CARED FOR YOU

FORGIVE ONE ANOTHER, AS I HAVE FORGIVEN YOU

BE THERE FOR ONE ANOTHER, AS I WAS THERE FOR YOU

EACH ONE OF YOU ARE VERY SPECIAL TO ME IN YOUR OWN SPECIAL WAY

Helen's last words to her husband were, "Tell everybody that I love them." If she had elective surgery for her aortic aneurysm, she had only a 30% chance of making it. If she made it, there was a 90% chance she ould be on life support for her remaining days on this earth. She elected to go without the surgery and that was her gift to the family. She did not want to be a burden when there was no hope for any quality of life. Helen always thought of others before her own well being. She was a very special person

Helen, may you rest in God's loving arms. Thank you for the wonderful memories, They will live forever in the heart of your family and friends.

Prayers of the Faithful: Tonya Darcangelo daughter of Mary (Mack) Darcangelo

Gifts presented by: The Grandchildren

Juliana Mack daughter of Daniel Mack Jr.

Jackie Darcangelo daughter of Mary(Mack)Darcangelo

Jennifer Cooper daughter of Sharon (Mack) Cooper

Presentation Hymn: I Danced in the Morning

Liturgy of the Eucharist

Communion Rite

Processional Song: Be Not Afraid

Communion Meditation: Ave Maria soloist Michelle Wagner

FINAL COMMENDATION

Song of Farewell: How Great Thou Art

Recessional Hymn: Amazing Grace pipes by Jacob Jack Jarosinski